Today we celebrated Elise's third birthday. We can't believe it.
This blog is really focused on Lena and her monthly changes right now. Just like it was for Elise at this age. While Elise's development isn't as drastic month to month anymore. The strides she's made in the last 12 months have astounded my husband and me. Granted, we are her parents and there's a certain amount of bias in anything we have to say about her in that respect. BUT we have also done our fair share (me especially) of studying and learning about proper development for children. Enough to know that Elise is ahead of the game. Sometimes it scares us a little how smart she is. I'll try to write in detail in this blog how she's changed over the last year.
Physically she hasn't changed too much. She has way more hair now. She's even had a real haircut. Her hair was growing out but it was long and tangles very easily (fine hair like her mama's), so we opted for a shorter do to give it the chance to thicken up and grow evenly. Elise has also gone from barely wearing a 2T size to wearing 4T. She's had a pretty crazy year, just like the rest of our little family, so we had postponed things like upgrading to a big girl bed and potty training until recently.
Elise had always been extremely well behaved. The first six months of 2015, I swear I didn't ever even have to use timeouts. She was so good everywhere we went. She listened and was polite. Notice the past tense? After Lena was born, we immediately moved. Then we moved again. And again and then one more time. Not too mention having to deal with a new sibling and now having to share her mom, her best friend who always gave her 100% of her love and attention. By the time we settled in Enid, Elise was struggling. She acted out more, pushed the envelope more and got an attitude that a preteen would be proud of. She's really challenged my husband and I. I guess at her age (2), we should've known we wouldn't escape the entire year without some kind of issues with her behavior. Time outs have increased, and even some spankings have been dealt out. Though my husband and I hate doing it and we really try to make it a last resort as we feel that physical punishment like that should be. She has started saying No to us, or arguing with us. This is where her being smart scares us! The girl can really argue. And she has the stubbornness of her mama. My mom says she's A LOT like I was at her age. Except with her princess obsession. I was more into dogs and other animals. Anyway, the girl has tested us. She is now in a big girl bed and naps are still a challenge but she actually does pretty well at night. She may give us some trouble going to bed, but once she's down, she's down until morning. Hope she keeps that up! We have started potty training and we are so close to her being potty trained.
Obviously, since Elise is arguing with us, her vocabulary has greatly increased. We always marvel how in just 3 short years, Elise has gone from being a tiny sleeping creature that literally couldn't do a thing for herself to being someone we have legitimate conversations with. When she turned 2, she was using 2-3 word sentences. Now, not only are her sentences longer and more complex, but they are also being used to ask questions that aren't just Yes or No answers. Yesterday, our conversation coming home from school went something like this:
E (drinking from spiderman cup): Mom, is Spiderman a super hero?
Me: Yes, he is.
E: Is a fireman a super hero?
Me: Yeah, you might say that.
E: Why are they super heroes?
Me: Well, they help and save people that need help.
E: How do they do that?
Me: They help people put out fires or get out of places they might be stuck in.
E: Why do they help people?
Me: I think it's because they like to do it. It makes them feel good to help others when they need it.
Conversations like this are becoming a regular occurrence. My husband is thrilled. He's waited a long time for our child to be in the "Why?" stage. He's always been big on us actually answering all of her questions and not being dismissive about them. Sometimes its hard. She can go a long time continuing to ask questions or ask the same ones over and over again. But we think its worth our effort to keep informing her truthfully and letting her know her questions are valid and her voice is being heard.
Elise is now old enough to help us with chores around the house. She's really good at it too. She now does the following chores:
Brings me her dirty dishes
Helps switch and "fold" laundry
Puts away her clothes and shoes
Puts away her toys
Helps me and daddy cook/bake
Puts her trash in the trash can
Things that Elise enjoys doing on her own:
Playing with her doll house
Dressing up like a Princess
Playing outside
Holding and playing with bugs/animals/reptiles/amphibians
Taking baths (or showers with mom or dad)
Making her sister laugh
Painting and coloring
Cooking in her pretend kitchen
Singing in her microphone
Reading
Speaking of reading.....this girl can memorize a book faster than any ADULT we know. Three days after reading a new book to her, she will have it memorized well enough to pretty much read it back to us. I think this trait of hers will go a LONG way in helping her learn to read sooner rather than later. We cannot wait for her to be able to read to us.
I gotta say, my husband and I have been together close to ten years now. We have navigated through some tough stuff, miscarriages, deployments, deaths of loved ones, losing our dog, etc. Being able to keep a strong connection with each other during these things is noteworthy. But this parenting thing is by far our greatest challenge, and also our most favorite. Even when Elise is pushing the envelope and testing us, and I don't always feel so great in the moment about it, I actually really enjoy sitting with my husband and coming up with game plans for how to improve her behavior and be better examples for her. We aren't naive enough to believe our children will always be perfect. I think our expectations for them are pretty realistic. But I am pretty proud of how we communicate about it and brainstorm solutions. If we get into a pickle and neither of us has a very strong opinion or information about the situation, we take turns doing a bit of research and do some trial and error. The way we parent together is a pretty strong reminder to me that I married the right person. I've always thought he brings out the best version of my personality, but now I'm realizing that he also makes me the best mom I know how to be. I only hope he can say the same about me
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